To celebrate the 2018 Winter Olympics, we’ve put together a list of everyday activities that we think should become Olympic events.
What kinds of feats do you think you could win … if everyday activities were Olympic events? Without further ado, we present to you … The Everyday Olympic Games for the Average Person!
“AROUND THE HOUSE” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Bringing all the groceries into the house in one trip.
Mowing “school figures” into the lawn.
Assembling IKEA furniture.
Flicking dog poop off of the back patio with a flat shovel (distance event).
Vacuuming: the longest and most creative cord reach.
Speed-cleaning before company comes over.
Tossing the ball back over the neighbor’s fence (distance event).
Folding a fitted sheet.
Putting a fitted sheet on the bed.
“KITCHEN” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Stacking and fitting all of the Tupperware containers in the cabinet.
Loading the dishwasher.
Best Ramen recipes.
Piling the trash in the garbage can as high as possible, before it falls over or someone else takes it out.
Guessing the date on the leftovers.
Cutting onions — first tear loses.
“SHOPPING” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Scooter relay at WalMart.
Getting an item off the top shelf.
Grocery cart curling.
Dodging people (acquaintances, pollsters, Girl Scouts, etc.), to avoid smalltalk.
Going into WalMart or Target and coming out with only toilet paper.
Grocery shopping before a predicted snowfall.
“INTERNET/SMART PHONE” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Arguing in the Facebook comments.
Texting while walking.
“WORK” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Resolving office printer errors and copier jams.
Filing in alphabetical order.
Staying awake in an earnings meeting.
Catching the elevator.
Carrying a coffee mug like a pro — without spilling it.
“PARENTING” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Walking across Legos without screaming.
Changing a baby’s diaper.
“TELEVISION” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Fast-forwarding the DVR through commercials without cutting into your show.
Longest Netflix binge.
“AUTOMOTIVE” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Getting to your destination before the estimated time of arrival in Google Maps.
Driving on “empty” (distance event).
Maneuvering through rush-hour traffic (extra points for not dropping the F bomb!).
“WINTER WEATHER” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Shoveling the driveway without slipping on the ice.
Getting around on a snowy day.
Doing donuts in the car.
“ADULTING” OLYMPIC EVENTS:
Giving exact change without a register telling you how much to give back.
Completing your taxes.
Ordering the most complex drink possible at Starbucks.
Turning off alarm from six feet away, without getting out of bed.
Making witty or sarcastic comebacks.Staying sane and surviving in a very insane world.
If there’s one thing that compiling this article has shown me, it’s that — at our core — we’re all the same … each trying our best to conquer our lives in the best way we can!! And we all have our hidden, unappreciated talents. I guess what I’m trying to say is that in the Olympics of life, we’re all winners. *sappy tears*
Do you have an Olympic event to add to our list? Add it in the comments below!